The holidays are right around the corner, but that’s no reason to give up on finding love or keeping your couples passion sizzling hot. If you’re in a relationship, the in-laws might be driving you crazy or the kids and pets may keep jumping up on the bed ruining your chances for intimacy. Or, if you’re single, you might feel lonely or left out, and wish the stupid cozy, romantic season would just end already.
That’s why I’ve come up with ten great ideas for couples and singles to make love and sex a priority this season.
10 Tips For Couples
- Plan for sex by making a date ahead of time – tell your in-laws to take the kids to a movie, or go for it in the middle of the afternoon when no one is home. And make sure to keep the conversation about intimacy on the date!
- Being quiet while you’re having sex can super-charge your erotic experience, especially if your family or friends are in the next room. Giggling like teenagers in your childhood bedroom has its own kinky rewards, so don’t be too quick to rule it out.
- Use technology to build anticipation. Send your partner sexts describing what you’d like to do during the day to make them smile, and invite them to rendezvous later.
- Quickies never go out of style. You might only have fifteen minutes alone with your partner, so make out passionately, give each other oral pleasure or tease with a little striptease. Sex doesn’t always have to be a marathon.
- Put some sexy toys on your partner’s gift list so that you can share new experiences together and have even more fulfilling sex.
- Do a “sexy wish exchange” with your partner. Exchange a fun list of three things that could heighten a romantic, sensual and sexual experience for you with your partner, as in: “I wish you would give me a sensual massage.”
- Eat chocolate! Chocolate releases neurotransmitters such as Dopamine and Serotonin that can work as an anti-depressant and make us feel like we are happier or even in love!
- Steal a kiss with your lover at least twice a day in the morning and at night but make your smooches last for at least 12 seconds! This is a sure way to maintain passion and intimacy in your relationship. An added bonus is that the man transfers testosterone from his saliva to a woman’s mouth during passionate kissing. You can get away from the crowd for 12 seconds, right?
- Play a sexy game – Are you a couple lucky enough to be alone together for the holidays? Have a playful night of strip poker, truth or dare or try one of the many adventures in my book The Sexy Little Book of Sex Games.
- Watch or read erotica together. You may be surprised how quickly you’ll both be in the mood if you indulge in some sexy movies or read passages from a naughty book to each other.
If you’re single, make the season a sexy one by treating yourself as if you are madly in love with you! The first step is to lower your stress, which triggers cortisol levels and then increase oxytocin, known as the love hormone.
10 Tips For Singles
- Laughter is the best medicine and releases bursts of the feel-good hormone oxytocin, so go to a comedy club or watch a funny movie.
- Listening to soothing music releases oxytocin, so listen when you are in stressful situations such as driving in rush hour or cooking. Also, listen to your favorite music without multitasking as studies show that just listening to music for 30 minutes a day is as healthy as meditation.
- Do accept invitations to parties and don’t be afraid to go out with someone new on a date even if you know they are not who you are looking for, they could introduce you to your soul mate, become a great friend or even a business contact.
- Sexycise to stay in shape and release feel-good endorphins by going to the gym, taking a yoga or Pilates class and even going for a walk in the park or on a beach, which can lead to meeting another sexyciser!
- Solo sex with some warming lube is a great way to heat up a cool winter night. Self-pleasuring can boost your immunity so you’ll be less likely to get a pesky cold!
- Buy yourself a naughty gift such as satin sheets, new undies, a sex toy, erotic DVD or a sexy book.
- Remember that being alone without being lonely is very healthy – so own it! It’s not a negative thing that you need to be ashamed of, it’s an opportunity to reflect on the kind of partner you would want in your life.
- Write a list of things you would do if you had your dream partner – why can’t you do them anyway? Take a stroll downtown to enjoy the holiday lights or take yourself out for dinner, to a movie, theatre or a concert and enjoy!
- Pamper yourself! Book a massage, a facial, a mani and pedi, or a whole day at the spa! Self-love brings more love toward you.
- Get festive and decorate your home, then curl up with a great movie and a glass of wine or cup of tea. Even if no one will see your efforts, YOU will. And that’s the point. You’re worth it. Now take a selfie!