Missouri Bill Defines Sex Between Lobbyists & Lawmakers As “Gifts”

A new bill in Missouri was proposed that says lobbyists who have sex with lawmakers would have to fill out a form and declare it as a “gift.” Any sexy time between lobbyists and “lawmakers or lawmaker’s staff” would have to be disclosed to the Missouri Ethics Commission, reports The Kansas City Star. Let’s see, last month there were two blowjobs, one quickie, and a double penetration. This next month let’s put down 2 major bone-a-thons, one anal, and a hand job. The blow job was the best and so “giving.”

The bill, sponsored by Rep. Bart Korman, Republican requires that a “monthly lobbyist gift disclosure form” would have to be filled out, which would make it the the new juiciest read in Kansas City.

According to the bill:

“For purposes of subdivision of this subsection, the term ‘gift’ shall include sexual relations between a registered lobbyist and a member of the general assembly or his or her staff. Relations between married persons or between persons who entered into a relationship prior to the registration of the lobbyist, the election of the member to the general assembly, or the employment of the staff person shall not be reportable under this subdivision. The reporting of sexual relations for purposes of this subdivision shall not require a dollar valuation.”

The 2016 legislative session began after a year of sex scandals involving sex with sexy interns, a Senator, and the House Speaker, who were both forced to resign.

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